Space Ninja

To make a long story short, they wired me up like you can see in the photo above. I had electrodes taped to my legs, shoulders and head, some wires wrapped around my chest, a laser taped to my finger to measure my blood oxygen level, and some tubes in my nostrils to measure my temperature and air flow. Set up like this, I got into bed where I discovered that due to the way I was wired into the bed, I couldn’t really move. I had to call the technician in to disconnect me so I could go to the bathroom before bed, and also to turn out my light.

Once the light was out, even though I was tired, I couldn’t fall asleep. Admittedly, I was in a strange bed in a strange room and was going to bed two hours early, but I think the real problem was that I was really uncomfortable. I was very aware of all the wires, and I wasn’t allowed to lie on my side, which is how I normally go to bed. Typically, I fall asleep within minutes of getting in bed, but I lay there staring at the ceiling for what felt like an hour or two. I don’t know for sure, because there was no clock in the room.

To make matters worse, I immediately felt like I had to pee again, even though I had just gone to the bathroom. I told myself that it was all in my head - I just wanted to because I knew I couldn’t without calling the technician back in, but with nothing else to focus on, it was hard to convince myself.

I kept adjusting myself slightly, moving my legs around, re-settling my head (and the wires) on the pillow. I was really warm, so I kicked the covers off, but then I got cold and had to pull them back up. I was completely miserable.

Despite all that, I must have fallen asleep because when the door opened, it woke me up. He said I “qualified” for a mask, which I thought was a funny way to put it - like I had won something. I guess it was about 2am, since that’s when he said he would come in if I needed the mask. He disconnected me so I could go to the bathroom again, and then put the mask over my face.

The mask fits over your nose and mouth like an oxygen mask in the hospital, and it constantly blows air in. It straps around your head over and below your ears, and he had to adjust it pretty tight so that the air didn’t leak out. It was tight enough to be uncomfortable without quite hurting, but this morning my jaw hurts from the pressure that was on it all night. The air blowing on my face took a bit to get used to, but wasn’t really a problem. The problem was that when I breathed out, there was nowhere for it to go, so it took a second to dissipate - but I was already breathing in, which means all night I was breathing in what I just breathed out, so I felt short of breath all night.

With the mask on, I was even more uncomfortable, and was once again wide awake, so the whole cycle of lying in bed trying not to think about wanting to roll over or go to the bathroom started again. Several times, I would start to drift off, only to be woken up by the pressure in the mask suddenly changing as the technician adjusted it from his monitoring station.

Again, after what I think was several hours, I fell asleep, and was woken up at 6am by the technician coming in to disconnect the wires. He asked how I slept, and I told him I slept terribly (which it seems like he would already know since he was monitoring me). I asked him whether the mask helped and he said that it helped the snoring immediately go away, but he wasn’t quite able to find the right pressure to address the rest of my breathing issues. He said that sometimes it takes several nights to get everything adjusted right.

He sent me home with the mask, so that I can talk to my doctor at the followup appointment about whether or not she should prescribe one of the breathing machines for me. At this point, I can’t imagine dealing with this every night.