Annie and I are moving back to Portland. There are a lot of reasons, and I’ll touch on them, but at the heart of it, we’ve just come to realize that we’re not happy here, and that we’d be happier in Portland. It isn’t any one overwhelming thing, it’s more the cumulative effect from lots of things, and the realization that things would be easier back in P-town.
Commuting
Commuting in Seattle is horrific compared to Portland. There are much fewer ways in and out of the city, which naturally makes for heavier traffic on each route. Plus, the layout of the city means that a single wreck can snarl traffic for hours – resulting in me getting stuck in a traffic jam on fourth ave. and missing the last train home. The city just isn’t built for the level of traffic it’s getting, and the problem isn’t getting better anytime soon.
Added to that is the public transportation system, which (as I’ve mentioned before) is a confusing and inconsistant mess that punishes new riders, and costs way too much. I’m shelling out $150 a month and spending nearly two hours a day commuting back and forth from Seattle to Puyallup, and whenever there’s even the slightest hiccup in the system, I have to add at least an hour to that because of the lack of alternate routes, and the infrequency of the ones that do exist.
Finally (and this isn’t really Seattle’s fault), we’re too far away from everything. We stayed in the Puyallup area to be close to Dave and Rose and Annie’s folks, but they’re both 15+ minutes away, and everyone else is in Seattle, around 45 minutes. There’s nothing within walking distance, so we feel like we spend all our time driving everywhere.
Now, admittedly, some of these problems would be addressed by moving into Seattle proper, but one of the main reasons we moved up here was to be close to Annie’s family, so that sort of defeats the purpose. Plus, (and please, Seattle zealots just bite your tongue here and respect our opinion) we just like Portland better than Seattle. For us, if we’re going to live in a city, we’d rather it be Portland. So if we’re not here to be close to family, then there’s no reason for us to choose Seattle over Portland.
Employment
The job market up here is about the same as in Portland. It’s not really any harder or easier for me to find tech work or for Annie to find nanny work, with one major exception. The bulk of the work is in the city, so I have to commute, and Annie would have to drive. I’ve been trying to adjust to this for months now, and it’s just putting too big a strain on my life. I feel like I spend the bulk of my day at work or commuting (and it’s true, I’m out of the house for 12+ hours every day!). I’ve been struggling with this even with my relatively easy commute on the train, but it would be a nightmare for Annie to drive in and out of the city every day, to say nothing of what it would cost in gas and parking.
As for my current job, I don’t think it would be tactful to get into it here. Suffice to say that I gave my notice and it’s amicable. I don’t hate them and they don’t hate me, but it’s time to admit that it’s just not working out. I’m leaving on a good note, and I’ve gained some experience. Most importantly, I’ve gained some much-needed perspective on what I’m looking for in a job, so I’ll be able to go into my new job search much more confident about what my needs are, and about what my strengths are to sell myself on. Web production, here I come!
Isolation
This is probably the most insidious factor of living up here. As a result of the commute and the job and the layout up here, Annie and I feel like we never really have time to do anything on week nights. We come home every night, make some sort of dinner, watch some TV, and go to bed so we can do it all over again the next day. We don’t want to become people who live for their weekends, and drudge through the weeks.
This sense of isolation, I should point out, has nothing to do with our friends or family up here, who have all been wonderful. We love our Washington people, but the situation is combining with our own natural isolationist tendancies, and we feel like we’re getting cut off from the things we love to do.
This kind of thing is bad for anyone, but it’s particularly dangerous for Annie. Social isolation was one of the major factors in her earlier bouts with depression, and it’s one of the things we’ve had to train ourselves to watch out for. And while I’ve trained myself to push Annie out of these funks, I have a tendancy (especially if I’m drained or stressed) to withdraw and become antisocial, so it’s definitely something we’re concerned about.
Portland
Now, not to present Portland as a magical land of milk and honey, but it does address our main concerns. Public transportation is cheap, runs frequently, and goes everywhere with lots of options. The city is laid out in such a way that everything is closer together to begin with, and has more ways in and out of the city, so traffic is less of a problem. The job market for me is virtually identical, but much better for Annie, who can get a full-time nanny position almost immediately, with a good paycheck and benefits. And finally, we’re much less isolated in Portland, both because we’re living in the city proper, and because we just know more people in the area.
Is there a “the grass is greener in Portland” factor here? Sure. But there are enough real, concrete benefits that we’re willing to roll with that. And when you combine it with the fact that none of our big plans for Washington have worked out, and that we’re in a position where we can just move back to Portland and start over without any real problems, we’re convinced.
My last day at work is next Friday, the 15th, and then I’ve got a couple weeks to pack before our apartment lease is up at the end of the month. We’re going to load a truck and move all our stuff into a storage unit in Portland, and both move in with our parents for the month of August to save money. I’ll spend August in Portland getting my head on straight, beefing up my resume, learning more PHP, and looking for an apartment. Annie will spend it in Milton with her parents, finishing up her nanny jobs in the area, before moving to Portland in early September, hopefully moving right into a new apartment – possibly in the same neighborhood we were in before.
So, we’ve come a long way and learned a lot about ourselves and our motivations, and now we’re headed back where we started, kicking ass in Portland.
Documenting your reasons for moving is a useful exercise in clarifying your thinking … getting your head straight, as it were.
But keep in mind that you don’t have to justify this (or any other) move to anyone but yourselves. You’re actually allowed to live anywhere you want … just because you want to.
We were saddened when you moved north because we knew we wouldn’t see you as often … but we didn’t try to talk you out of it as it was your decision to make. It would be the same if you moved across the continent … we’d be sad but supportive.
I will allow as how we’re glad you’re returning … B-)
I back you guys fully on this one. I’ll come right out and say it: Seattle Sucks Ass. Welcome back to the best city in the USA! Viva la PDX!
Sasha
Bah!
Seattle has grown on me over the last 2 years, though I have loved Portland all of my life. Under the right circumstances, it’s an amazing place to be with wonderful people.
Needless to say, those are not the conditions under which you’re living in Seattle.
It’s a little sad to think how rarely I’ve seen you since you’ve lived here, but perhaps that speaks to how isolated you’ve been. It’s a little funny to think that I may see you more when you’re back in Portland. It sounds like you know what you want in a place to live (a walking community, friends, easy access to work), and I’m glad you’re doing what you need to get them, whether it’s in Seattle or Portland.
Good luck.
Seattle has always seemed to me to parallel New York in a lot of ways, one of them that for certain people, it’s the perfect place to live. For others, it’s like hell on earth. I know a few people who’ve moved up to the Seattle area, and for most of them it didn’t work out. I also know a few people who’ve moved to New York, and that didn’t work out.
In both cities, it seems to have a lot to do with who you know, and who you’re around. You do well if you surround yourself with similar people, but sometimes you just can’t find that groove, or you just keep meeting the wrong people.
Molli and I lucked out when we were in Brooklyn in that we found the perfect neighborhood and environment for how we wanted to live, and what we wanted to do. The only reason we had to move was that without having finished school, we couldn’t get into the careers we were interested in, and thus couldn’t afford to stay in the area we loved.
Now, of course, it would be difficult to go back, so we’re on a quest for a new place to love (which, for reasons not relevant here, is not portland). I think we were all a little surprised when you guys moved up north, because you both love Portland, and it didn’t seem like either of your loved Puyallup.
But now you’ve figured that out for yourself, so . . . yeah. Good luck. And bring your x-box, ’cause Sean’s is on the fritz.
It’s always a struggle for me to decide whether or not I would be glad to move back to that area. Of course, I would like to remain a WA resident, which means we would live in Vancouver, but I’ve always loved Portland, too, and I bet Sig could get work there more easily now that he has a security clearance and speaks Russian.
However, I REALLY love the Kitsap peninsula; it’s where our friends and family are. Sometimes I think it might be more healthy to live away from our family (the time in CA was very beneficial to my state of mind as an adult), and our friends on this side of the water are going through some weird changes and dwindling a bit, but we’re so attached to them . . . And now that I have a whole bunch of nieces and a nephew, it’s harder to justify leaving, especially since we want to have children of our own.
More power to you. :) Portland is a gorgeous city, and boasts a MUCH better night life. Good luck with your move! :)